Snoop Troop: It Came from Beneath the Playground Read online

  IÕm Sherlock Holmes,

  and if I were still alive, IÕd

  use the Magnus Maximus 10X,

  for shizzle! It makes small

  things look bigger, yo!

  Beveled glass, hand carved in the

  mountains of Bavaria, Idaho!

  Objects look ten times

  bigger and twenty times

  more disgusting!

  Comfortable rubber handle.

  Great grip for serves and backhands!

  Handy hidden

  soup spoon for the

  hungry detective!

  I just discovered a

  secret treasure map

  that, for some reason,

  just burst into flames!

  I just used it to track

  strange critter footprints

  on the school playground!

  KIRK SCROGGS

  Snoop

  Troop

  IT CAME FROM BENEATH

  THE PLAYGROUND

  Little, Brown and Company

  New York Boston

  This book is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents are the product

  of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual events,

  locales, or persons, living or dead, is coincidental.

  Copyright © 2014 by Kirk Scroggs

  Cover art © 2014 by Kirk Scroggs

  Cover design by Tracy Shaw

  Cover © 2014 Hachette Book Group, Inc.

  All rights reserved. In accordance with the U.S. Copyright Act of 1976, the scanning,

  uploading, and electronic sharing of any part of this book without the permission of the

  publisher is unlawful piracy and theft of the author’s intellectual property. If you would

  like to use material from the book (other than for review purposes), prior written

  permission must be obtained by contacting the publisher at [email protected].

  Thank you for your support of the author’s rights.

  Little, Brown and Company

  Hachette Book Group

  237 Park Avenue, New York, NY 10017

  Visit our website at lb-kids.com

  Little, Brown and Company is a division of Hachette Book Group, Inc.

  The Little, Brown name and logo are trademarks of Hachette Book Group, Inc.

  The publisher is not responsible for websites (or their content)

  that are not owned by the publisher.

  First ebook edition: September 2014

  ISBN 978-0-316-24273-8

  E3

  To Isaac

  Special thanks to

  Steve Deline; Joanna Stampfel-Volpe;

  Diane, Corey, Candace, and Charlotte Scroggs;

  Camilla and Marisa Deline; Joe Kocian;

  Mark Mayes; and a twenty-one-Snoop-Troop

  salute to Andrea Spooner, Deirdre Jones,

  Tracy Shaw, and the whole Little, Brown crew.

  Woo-hoo!

  An Important Message

  from the Narrator

  Yo! Attention, all you wannabe

  detectives out there!

  Justice needs your help. Some lowlife, sneaker-

  sniffin’ criminal is stealing all the fun from the

  kids of Murkee Elementary School. Help my

  detectives put this creep behind bars. Examine

  each page of this case file closely for clues,

  especially if you see a magnifying glass like the

  one below. I’d help out, but I’m too busy looking

  for Rocco the Racketeering Raccoon. Now, where

  could that little fleabag be?

  Find

  Rocco!

  Chapter 1

  BY THE BOOK

  After school at Murkee Elementary...

  Silence creeps

  over the halls

  like a spilled

  Blue Raspberry

  Icee....

  Chalk dust settles on

  the cold classroom floors

  like volcanic ash....

  Tumbleweeds roll

  through the empty

  playground, tumbling

  over and over, like a

  narrator who just

  won’t shut up....

  The day is Wednesday.

  The time is 4:25 PM.

  Remember that!

  All that we hold dear

  could depend on it!

  That’s fourth-grader Logan Lang sitting in the

  dark, dank library, just like she does every day

  after school, surrounded by her friends....

  And when I say

  “friends,” I mean

  mystery books,

  crime novels,

  and twisted tales

  of suspense....

  They’re all she has in this cold, lonely world.

  Okay, I think

  they get it. IÕm

  a little too into

  mystery books.

  A BRIEF HISTORY OF LOGAN

  Circumstantial

  evidence!

  Your efforts

  to conceal

  the cookies

  were futile.

  How sweet!

  YouÕre making

  Mommy

  pancakes!

  Actually, IÕm

  dusting for

  fingerprints.

  You know, IÕm really a lot

  less nerdy these days.

  Now, if youÕll excuse me,

  I have to ask the librarian

  something very important.

  Ahem! Do you have any mysteries involving small,

  furry animals, preferably of the order Rodentia?

  This is her idea of being less nerdy.

  You know, you

  should really get

  out more often.

  Oh, thatÕs okay.

  I love this stuff!

  No, I mean you should

  really get out. WeÕve been

  closed for an hour!

  Miss Perusa, the librarian, gives Logan just

  five more minutes to grab as many small, furry

  animal mystery books as she can find.

  Find the small,

  furry animal

  mysteries!

  But before Logan can check out her giant stack

  of books, a voice blares out across the library!

  It’s coming from her combination police radio/

  lunch box....

  It picks up a hundred

  frequencies and

  smells like bologna

  and corn chips.

  I REPEAT,

  ATTENTION,

  ALL UNITS!

  ATTENTION,

  ALL UNITS!

  WE HAVE A CODE BLUE

  AT THE CORNER OF

  IVANA AND RALPH!

  Ivana and Ralph?

  ThatÕs the amusement park!

  I better get over there, quick!

  Logan tries to gingerly tiptoe down the hall

  toward the exit when...

  It’s Gustavo Muchomacho,

  Logan’s arch-nuisance!

  He’s conducting his weekly after-school Macho

  Cop Club for Kids meeting.

  You gotta stop by

  todayÕs meeting. Today

  IÕm demonstrating

  martial-arts police

  moves. Plus, Wiggens

  brought Cheez Krinkles!

  Uh…actually, IÕve got

  somewhere to be.

  AN EVEN BRIEFER HISTORY

  OF GUSTAVO

 
Freeze,

  punk!

  I said

  freeze,

  dirtbag!

  You’re headed to a real-life crime

  scene, aren’t you? I knew it! Let me

  grab my gear and I’ll join you!

  Sorry, dude. Crime scenes are

  very delicate. They require a highly

  skilled master detective. No room

  for junior rookie cops.

  Oh, I get it! IÕm not good enough

  for you! Well, this “rookie” doesnÕt

  have time to help you anyway.

  I have a Jujitsu Anaconda

  Death Grip to demonstrate

  on young Wiggens here!

  Chapter 2

  MERRY-GONE-MISSING

  Hurling Rivers Amusement Park...

  When Logan arrives, the place is taped off like

  an unopened birthday present and crawling

  with cops.

  That’s Captain Mosely of the Murkee City Police

  Department....

  Boys, this oneÕs a doozy.

  IÕve heard of stolen cars,

  stolen paintings, stolen glances

  across a crowded room…

  but a stolen merry-go-round?

  ThatÕs a new one on me!

  Sure enough, there’s just a big hole in the ground

  where the carousel used to be.

  An amusement

  park without a

  merry-go-round.

  ItÕs like a pizza

  without pepperoni,

  a Christmas

  without Santa, a

  pig without a tutu.

  Look for

  evidence!

  Cap’n! We got some

  pink, fuzzy fibers

  over here!

  It might be

  some sort of

  evidence.…Oh,

  wait…um…

  yummm.…My

  bad. It’s just

  cotton candy.

  You’re right. Um…

  yum.…We’re gonna

  need more of these

  fibers, and maybe

  a churro and a diet

  root beer.

  We’re getting

  nowhere here.

  I’m gonna go

  look for clues.

  I don’t think you’re supposed to go past that

  police tape.

  Good point. Carry on.

  Thanks!

  Okay, but this is going

  to be a pretty boring

  book if I donÕt.

  What have you got there?

  My magnifying

  glass and

  pad of paper

  for sketching

  suspects.

  I didn’t know you could draw.

  Sure I can. HereÕs an

  artistÕs rendering of the

  notorious TeachersÕ Lounge

  Cookie Bandit. Turns out it

  was Principal Shrub. I let

  him off with a warning.

  That was nice of you.

  While the cops eat the evidence, Logan sets out

  in search of her own clues. Somewhere on the

  deserted boardwalk, she gets the

  creepy sensation that someone is

  hiding nearby.

  Who’s

  hiding?

  Suddenly,

  a sniffly old man bursts out

  of a pile of stuffed animals!

  It’s Izzy Hurling,

  owner of Hurling

  Rivers Amusement

  Park, and he’s quite

  sneezy.

  Gesundheit,

  Mr. Hurling.

  Don’t

  let ’em get

  away!!!

  Don’t let

  who get

  away?

  The ones who

  stole my

  merry-go-round!

  Don’t worry—

  I brought my trusty

  doodle pad.

  Why,

  thank you!

  Actually,

  that paper’s

  for sketching

  suspects.

  Oh.

  Listen to Old Man Hurling’s

  description and draw

  the culprit on a piece

  of scratch paper, the

  chalkboard, or your

  mom’s favorite tablecloth!

  They were really short and pudgy

  with brown, spiky hair all over.

  They had itty-bitty beady eyes.

  Their snouts were pointy.

  Their arms and legs were stubby.

  They had long claws that were

  covered in dirt.

  Is this what

  they looked like?

  Eeegah! ThatÕs

  them! There

  were hundreds

  of Õem! Keep it

  away from me!

  You again? IÕve warned you about

  trespassing on crime scenes. This place is

  crawling with stuffed animals, candy, and

  arcade games—itÕs no place for a kid!

  But, Captain, Old Man Hurling just gave

  me a description of the suspects. I think

  weÕre dealing with criminal moles!

  Moles, eh?

  That would

  explain the

  big hole in

  the ground.

  I got the moles

  cornered over

  here! I keep tryinÕ

  to whack Õem, but

  they just dart

  back in their holes!

  ItÕs gonna be a

  loooooong night.

  All of a sudden, a pint-size detective with two

  tons of attitude and a one-ton mustache is on

  the scene....

  Something about this guy looks familiar. Logan

  can’t quite place him, but she already has the

  urge to smack him with an overcooked bratwurst.

  Step aside, Officers!

  Detective Chuck Brawn

  is here to solve this

  carnival conundrum!

  Dude, that badge is from a gum-ball

  machine, and your ID is a frequent-shopper

  card from the Canned Ravioli Emporium.

  Since when do they allow

  preschoolers onto crime scenes?

  And what does a cop gotta do to

  get a cup of coffee around here?

  Detective Brawn, huh? I donÕt know

  you. What division do you work for?

  That would

  be the…

  uh, Long

  Division…in

  the Decimal

  System.

  You guys

  walked right

  over it!

  But thatÕs not nearly as

  important as this envelope I

  found at your crime scene!

  Hmmmm. The note inside is

  just a bunch of random letters.

  Must be a doctorÕs eye chart.

  No, silly! ItÕs a word jumble.

  If you unscramble the letters, youÕll

  get a message from the culprit.

  Unscramble

  the note!

  I’ve already

  taken the

  liberty of

  unscrambling

  it. It says

  “I WILL

  STRIKE

  AGAIN!

  YOU WILL

  YAP!”

  It's not Officer Chuck

  Brawn at all! It's Gustavo

  Muchomacho in a cheap

  fake mustache!

  I think it’s

  actually

  “YOU WILL

  PAY!”

  That is

  your opinion,

  missy. You

  are entitled

  to it.

  Missy?

  Why you…

  My upper lip
!

  Oh maaan! This

  always happens when

  I come here!

  Why’d they

  kick you out the

  last time?

  Let’s just say it

  involved a clown, a

  porta-potty, and

  a chili dog.

  Look, you two!

  I can’t have kids at

  my crime scenes.

  Now, why don’t you

  team up and form

  a make-believe

  detective agency

  or something?

  Team up? With him? Ha!

  I’d rather eat deep-fried

  lard on a stick!

  Ahem! Hey, you two, maybe you should team

  up like Captain Mosely suggested. Logan, with

  your smarts and Gustavo’s...uh...enthusiasm,